Not a lot of new posts going up, I feel obligated to offer my crap : )
Hubby is taking me out for a date tonight, I almost fell off my chair when he told me. I am highly suspicious of his motive. He told me yesterday afternoon:
"We need a sitter Friday, only for a few hours in the evening."
"Why?"
"Cause im going to take you out."
"What? Nuh-uh, your kidding...why? Whats the occasion? You serious? huh..."
"Nothing, I just want to take you out."
"Like on a date? Your fucking with me. Why do you want to take me out?"
"Is this really so shocking to you? Cause I want to."
"Ohkay...so where are we going?"
"Its a surprise."
"You asshole."
"Hahaha."
I love surprises when...well, idk how to put it...Lets start with why I hate surprises. I hate surprises because I think if its worth surprising someone with, it must be really super awesome, the longer the mystery goes on the more wild my imagination gets and if its beyond 72 hours I have convinced myself we won the lottery and ill spend the weekend riding elephants in Namibia. My imagination runs away and then when the surprise is revealed, im always disapointed! I love surprises when they are short and sweet, like if I was blindfolded and walked into a room with the surprise in it. Or if it was just a few hours. I just absolutly hate not knowing things. Its sort of like a tic I have.
Lets pretend you smashed your thumb with a hammer and reflexively covered it, I walk by and say "Whats up?" and you keep covering your thumb and hiding it from me "nothing...", "omg let me see! What happened!?", "Nothing."....I will stand there all day long begging you to let me see, cause I dont know, I have to know. I really annoy myself with this trait. Phil fucking loves it. Ill be passing by him and he will cup the air in his hands and say "omg!" and im all over it like white on rice, "WHAT?! Whats in your hand!?". I blame my brother. Childhood torture.
I think I started hating surprises when they start sucking. I remember it was my birthday and my boyfriend was the asshole abusive one at the t ime. He said he had a surprise for me. Ok, we have been dating a while, its prolly a romantic night out, maybe dinner, a movie, maybe a piece of jewelry...my thot; "Its gotta be something good if he wants to surprise me"....
The night came and left and he never did anything and I asked him, "So what was my surprise?"..."Oh yea! I almost forgot", and reached in his pocket and gave me a pill, "Wtf is this?", he gets all excited on the edge of his seat and says "oxycontin"..."are you fucking kidding me? You got me an illegal pain pill for my fucking birthday?"....Glad I only let that shit go on for another 3 years before I made my swift escape, lmfao! Brilliant Star, simply brilliant.
The build up of a surprise always leaves me wanting a little more is all...
Phil knows this exactly so he has also been fucking with me giving me little hints to really piss me off.
I tell him, "Babe, I love it when your sweet and stuff, but you know I hate these sort of surprises, ive had all this time to think about it and you know I have something really great in my head and your gonna end up taking me to mcdonalds and its gonna be lame and ill be mad at you!"
He says, "I know, thats why its so much fun!"...
"Grrr..."...
So here I am angry there are over 5 hours left in my work day and crazy excitedly anticipating where he is taking me or what our activity will be...
He's probably pregnant and wants to tell you when you're in a good mood.